Monthly Archives: August 2015

Bringing Out The Best in Your Child

Group Of Elementary Age children Running Outside

In the heart of every loving mom lies the question, how can I effectively bring out the best in my child? From my experience raising two daughters, I’ve discovered that most of us have what it takes to guide our children in achieving their best. Bringing out the best in your child begins with knowing your child so well you’re able to guide them in discovering their purpose in life. However, it doesn’t end there. It also includes encouraging them to live lives according to that purpose.

Over my 30 years of parenting, I’ve drawn many of my life’s mantras from the bible. A wise Proverb that articulates the heart of the matter is in chapter 22, verse 6. Train up a child in the way he should go [and in keeping with his individual gift or bent], and when he is old he will not depart from it. (Amplified Version) In other words, lead your child according to his or her bent, distinctive characteristics or “best”. How do you do this? Get to know your child. Spend time with him discovering his unique characteristics, gifts and abilities. Secondly, accept them. Don’t try to make an artist into an athlete. Don’t frustrate your child or yourself by forcing him into a career they are not suited for. Instead, encourage them to live lives according to who they are.

My children were relatively easy to nurture and guide into adulthood. Early on as babies, I recognized that my daughters were very different. Tara my oldest, is now 30 years old and is the introvert and thinker. She was a very happy baby, and an easy going toddler. When Tara was seven years old she loved to read “chapter books” and write short stories, poems, and newspaper articles. Her preference was spending time with one good friend and her family. Tara is our writer, a fourth grade elementary school teacher, wife, mom of four children, and curly girl-blogger.

Jessica, my younger daughter is 23 years old and is the extrovert and doer. She was a strong-willed toddler and was known to have a few temper tantrums. When she was three years old she wore a dress everyday to preschool, no kidding! Unlike Tara, she disliked reading and writing and preferred subjects such as math and science. Jessica had many friends and still does. As a teenager she enjoyed going out with her friends. This drove my husband crazy. He couldn’t understand why Jessica couldn’t stay in and read a book like Tara. When Jessica was ten years old she told the family she wanted to go into business and become an entrepreneur. As a result, she is now a distribution planner at a major fashion company. She is also a brand influencer and lifestyle and beauty blogger.

As you can see, my daughters have very different personalities. It was important for me as a mom to recognize their strengths and weaknesses at a young age. By doing that, I was able to guide and teach them how to embrace who they were and live lives according to their talents, abilities and purpose. To me, this is truly bringing out the best in your children.

 

Photo credits: Monkey Business

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Move Past The Pain…Embrace Who You Are.

I am free to be ME - positive words on a vintage slate blackboard

The greatest place to be in life is to have peace inside and be content with who you are. Finding out your great worth and realizing there is not another YOU, is such a freeing discovery.

Embracing your uniqueness, rather than focusing on your flaws can set you on a course for positive living. Not liking who you are and always comparing yourself to others is a miserable way to live. Of course we all have areas in our lives we need to refine and work on, but like yourself in the process and don’t be so hard on yourself.

You know, God made you exactly the way He wanted you to be and likes you just the way you are…actually, He loves you just the way you are! My favorite scripture is Psalm 139:13-14 (NLT), “You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.” How can you not feel special after reading that?! There’s no one like you — you are one of a kind! You are marvelously made! I heard someone once say, “God don’t make no junk!” You are valuable and need to grab hold of that truth, because the truth will set you free!

Become aware of the way you think and speak about yourself, and if it’s not kind…change it. If you are struggling with poor self image, like I did for many years, begin to speak positive affirmations over your life. You believe your words more than any other person, so I encourage you to make a list of all your good traits, strengths, abilities, and talents and go over them:

“I am beautiful.” “I am smart.” “I am caring.” “I am strong.” “I am a hard worker.” And the list goes on and on.

Whatever negative words have been spoken over you by others or yourself, release them and let them go today – never to have a hold on you again!

Be free to be you and be happy being you! When you’re content and at peace with who you are, others are drawn to you. No one wants to be around someone who is negative and constantly down on themselves. Be a light wherever you go…people follow light!

I encourage you to go look in the mirror today and say, “YOU ARE AWESOME and I LOVE YOU!” You may feel silly doing it, but mean it when you say it…and smile!

There’s a whole world out there waiting for your greatness — now go shine!

Building Strong Relationships -2

 

relationships1

Imagine two people that are attracted to one another.

They spend so much time talking to each other and making each other laugh. The attraction matures into love, and continues to grow.

During the early days of any relationship, couples spend a lot of TIME together. As a result the relationship blooms and flourishes. Spending time with someone may help you discover you are not a good fit for each other.

Whatever you do to attain a level of success in any area of life should be continued to maintain the success you enjoy.

Life gets busy, especially when couples start raising a family or  job schedule get really demanding.  Making time for one another now becomes something you consciously do.

A relationship that is not nurtured will wither away.

Spending time together is important but is that it?

No, there are so many tips to building strong relationships but  I choose to summarize building strong relationship with this analogy.

If you want to rise through the ranks and climb to the top of the career ladder what do you do?

You work hard, you invest in yourself to improve your productivity, you put a lot of effort into your career to make it a success. Exactly the same principle applies to building relationships. Strong relationships are cultivated by people who consciously invest time and effort in their relationships to make it what they want to be.

Make an effort to understand the other person and look for ways to be a blessing to him/her. Don’t always think about what you stand to gain, look for ways to give and add value to the other person’s life. Love always win, choose to take the high road of love and forgiveness.

You may have had a bad experience in life and you hate yourself for it. No matter how much love is shown to you, you have a difficulty in accepting the love.  This may have been causing problems in your relationship but you know what? That can change. You can learn to love yourself again.

Our next post by Jerriann Savelle Newton, the author of “Happy to me” will share strategies that will help you move past the pain and love yourself again

Building Strong Relationships – 1

Portrait Of Loving Couple In Countryside

Imagine this.

You meet two people and it is so obvious they are in love.

In your mind you are thinking , ” this is so cute, most likely they are planning their wedding.”

A few minutes later you start chatting with them, only to find out they have been married for almost 10 years  and even have children.

So what comes to mind next?

Maybe a question such as: ” How do you build lasting love relationships?” or ” How do you nurture marriage relationships”?

I remember as a young girl I used to wonder how love can last forever. I had questions on what it takes to build a strong  relationship.

Long before I got married, I started paying attention to people with admirable marriage relationship just to learn what they do differently that make their marriage beautiful. I also started feeding off materials on the subject.  One thing I have realized is that since we are all different, there is no “one size fit all” approach to relationships. However, there are general principles that cuts across the board and form the bedrock of strong relationships.

One key principle that I have learnt is TRUST.

Trust is the foundation of all successful relationships. Nothing could be more disheartening than to find out that your partner  is completely different from who you thought he/she was.

You are not perfect.

Guess what? No one is.

Love who you are, don’t try to be someone else.

Instead, work at becoming the best “you” you can possibly be. Just as you are not perfect, your partner is not perfect either. Accept him/her the way he/she is and grow together.

Look out for more tips in upcoming posts. I love to read from you. Leave your questions and comments below. Thank you

 

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